4 things to consider when making a hard decision

TL;DR: tips on getting yourself through life-altering decisions

Periodically throughout our lives, we will be faced with decisions that unhinge us. Be it the decision to leave your job, move in with your partner, relocate your life to the other side of the world… how do we ever know we are doing the right thing?

The truth is, we do not.

The process of making that decision can be excruciating. Weighing up the pros and cons until we are fatigued to a state of not making a decision at all.

Here are some important things to keep in mind, which might help you make that hard decision.

1. THERE IS NEVER A RIGHT OR WRONG DECISION — ONLY A SERIES OF CONSEQUENTIAL EVENTS THAT MIGHT BE GOOD OR BAD OR BOTH.

Believe it or not, the universe does not have a plan for you. YOU, and only you, have the plan for you. This means that whatever happens as a result of you making the decision will be a result of a million other consequential results of other people making other decisions. You cannot control what will happen after you make your decision, only that you make it. Whether the result is positive or negative will not be your fault. It is entirely possible that both options you are weighing up will turn out incredible, or turn out awful.

2. INACTION IS WORSE THAN MAKING THE DECISION

Whatever it might be you are weighing up, there is one certainty. Taking NO action on your decision in either direction, is a decision in itself. Think about that. By doing nothing, you are doing something. Are you happy with that?

3. MAKE PEACE WITH THE SACRIFICE

Every choice in life is a risk and a sacrifice. In choosing one thing, we are not choosing something else. That could be something as weighted as choosing a romantic partner or as trivial as a holiday destination! The reality is that we might have to give something up, whatever we decide. Make peace with what you are sacrificing on both sides of the coin. Perhaps one thing feels more painful than the other. Consider that.

4. MOST DECISIONS ARE REVERSIBLE

It probably feels big because you’re attaching the notion of “forever” to the outcome of your decision. Try bargaining with the notion of a “trial period” with yourself to see if it makes the decision feel any less threatening.

Life is a continuous stream of these big decisions. Be brave, make peace, and remember that action is very often the antidote to anxiety.